The Unfavorable Read online

  “So,” I start, rubbing my anxious palms on my thighs.

  Micah’s gaze falls on me when I speak, but he doesn’t stop chewing on his nails. I try to keep a positive tone to my voice, so the fear stays hidden. My stammering deceives me.

  “You look different,” I blurt. “Taller.”

  “Yeah, I guess,” he chuckles, lowering his hand to his lap, where he begins to pick at his cuticles instead. “You grew up a lot, too. I almost didn’t recognize you when I opened the door for you. Six years is a long time…”

  He trails off, eyes glazing over momentarily. A memory of when we were younger must have crossed his mind. I’m sure that’s how I look every time it happens to me. It only takes him a few minutes to pull himself out.

  I’m about to say something in response to his comment, but he shakes his head like he’s trying to clear the dirt from his scalp and looks at me again. There’s a somberness to his eyes now that I recognize. I’ve felt it for years.

  “If Ryder hadn’t been there,” Micah continues, “I would have assumed you weren’t related to me at all.”

  “You still look like you,” I reply. “Just older. More worn.”

  “I can’t say I’m surprised,” he shrugs, running a hand through his hair. Dust jumps off his head and floats down to the floor. “I was practically an adult when I was sent here.”

  “And this is where you’ve been this whole time?”

  I can’t help but ask the obvious. My voice quivers a little at the end, and I have to hold back tears. Of joy, frustration, relief, and disbelief. Everything that’s been building inside me from the moment he left the house for his Rite.

  “Yes,” he confirms. “After the Loyals dropped me off at the Boilers, I stood at the gate screaming that it was a mistake. That I wasn’t supposed to be there. None of the Unfavorable working that day even looked in my direction or acknowledged my existence. Not until I started crying like a baby.”

  “You cried?” I queried.

  Tears bubble in my eyes that I have to choke back. Hearing his story brings back every emotion I have ever experienced since he left again like an unstoppable force. Ryder adjusts himself uneasily, reminding me he’s still there.

  “I did. Only one man showed me kindness that day. His name is Aukai. He’s the elder of the village now, coincidentally, but back then he was just another hard working Unfavorable like the rest of us. Aukai took me under his wing and taught me how to survive outside the walls. I don’t think I would be alive if he hadn’t helped me.”

  The teapot over the fireplace begins to whistle, startling all three of us. The air around us is so electrified from our anxiety that even Ryder is feeling it now. I’m so immersed in Micah’s story that I forgot he had started tea. Apparently, he did as well.

  Micah stands, grabs an old piece of fabric from one of the storage containers and uses it to take the teapot away from the fire. Almost immediately, the whistling quiets down. He pours hot water into each of the cups before setting it on the table.

  Tossing the small towel back into the container, he brings out some handmade tea bags, placing one in each of our mugs. As he retakes his seat, he changes the subject.

  “What about you, Al,” he questions. His tone is lighter, as if purposefully trying to change the topic so we stop focusing on him and what he’s had to do. “What has your life been like within the walls without me?”

  “Lonely,” I admit. “I wondered what happened to you for years – I never stopped. All the Loyals told us when you vanished was they had taken you to a different section of town that would better help you with schooling. The thought gave me hope for about a year that you might come back, but when it went onto three years with no word and no sight of you, I began to wonder what really happened. It’s haunted me. Mom and Dad haven’t touched your room.”

  I leave out the fact that our parents seem to have stopped caring about his absence with my Rite scores. I’m not sure it’s a good idea to bring that up just yet.

  “The rest of my life,” I continue, “you’ve lived yourself. The pressure of school and doing well on the Rite… I don’t like talking about it. Tell me more about what you’ve been doing all these years. Please?”

  Micah opens his mouth to argue but stops when he sees me pleading. I’m still so angry with our parents that I’m not sure I could hold back the fact they’ve almost forgotten he ever existed because of my Rite. It’s too soon, though. I don’t want to ruin the reunion by bringing up something that might upset him.

  “Okay,” he concedes. “Uhmm… Aukai took me in and helped me build this hut from the ground up. He gave me food the first few days, so I wouldn’t starve, then got me work as a Drudge to earn my keep. I thought that it was going to be terrible living outside Geha without the technology and luxuries inside the walls, but it’s quite the opposite.

  “I’ve looked up to Aukai ever since we first met, and I strive to be like him someday,” he continues his tale. There’s a passion in his tone as he spokes that he never had in Geha. “I don’t think I want to have the responsibilities of an Elder, but I want to be the type of man he is. He helps people without thinking of how it could benefit himself.”

  “Thanks to him,” Micah goes on, “I’ve thrived here, outside the walls. More than I ever thought possible. The village accepts me as one of their own, I’ve started a school here for kids to learn to read and write, and I have my own garden out back. I use it to grow my own food but give it to others who can’t afford it.

  “Kids who have lost their parents,” he says, “or the elderly who can’t work for and support themselves anymore. And there’s so much more I want to do for the village. After all they have done for me. How much Aukai has done for me? Aukai was the father figure I needed when I had no one else to support me.”

  My blood begins to boil. Mom and Dad may not be showing much affection towards him, but that doesn’t make it okay for him to say that. To disrespect the people who raised us. As if he didn’t have a father before he was taken out of Geha.

  Logically, I know that his reaction to being abandoned outside the walls and having to essentially fend for himself would give him this attitude. Logically, it makes complete sense why he would feel this way. However, with all the overwhelming new information I’ve received since finishing my Rite has finally caught up with me.

  I can’t stop the rush of anger that floods my veins. He can’t abdicate them. That’s not how a family is supposed to be. If it’s so easy for everyone to let go of blood, then what does that mean for me? Who in this world would still love me if I hadn’t scored so well on my Bleeding Rite? Does any of this really matter, then?

  “You have a father,” I hiss between clenched teeth.

  “What?” Micah questions, confused. He had been lost in thought remembering the ‘good old days’ with this Aukai character. I interrupted his reverie with my spite.

  “You have a father,” I repeat, louder.

  Some of what I say is a lie, and I know that. Still, I can’t stop the words from escaping my lips. My tone crescendos to a yell by the end of my lengthy speech.

  “A father who has been worried sick about you for six years now,” I continue. “Our parents believed you were dead when you didn’t come back home, but still kept hoping to see you walk back through the front door to end our sorrow. They have been grieving the loss of their oldest child, and only son, for the past six years. I waited every day for years for a letter or message from you to let me know that you were okay. I thought you were dead.”

  My voice cracks. I reign in my emotions enough to hold back tears. Throughout my angry rant my gaze is trained on Micah’s. However, as my voice deceives me, my eyes are stare down at the dirt in front of my feet, and I can’t speak above a whisper. Not without risking another falter in my tone.

  “If the roles had been switched, and I had gone in your stead,” I say, my speech wavering with every syllable. “I would have found a way to get word back to my family tha
t remained, and at least let them know I was alive.”

  Redirecting my gaze, I decide to stare right into my brother’s pale green eyes again. He’s taken aback by my outburst. His mouth hangs open, but words don’t form. His bottom lip quivers trying to force sound, but only silence remains. A pregnant pause is all that we share now. He’s not my brother anymore, and I’m ashamed I thought he could be.

  No more than a minute goes by before my frustration and illogical rage overtakes me. If he has nothing to say for himself, then there’s no reason for me to stick around and wait for him to argue. I’ve done enough waiting. Too many years wasted thinking about someone who doesn’t share my tribulations.

  Using my anger, I launch myself up and off the couch, headed straight outside. The door swings easily open in my wake. The afternoon air hits me like a brick wall. It’s humid, causing sweat to drip all over my body as I stomp away from the damned hut. A gentle breeze is the only comfort I have in this filthy, subpar world.

  Chapter 14

  Alora

  As soon as I pass the threshold, I hear Ryder stand to follow me, the hay adjusting to the removal of his weight. There are only a couple steps before they stop. Micah must have stopped him since it isn’t long before I hear his voice. I’m a few feet away from the hut when I hear my brother calling out to me.

  “Al!” he yells. “Alora, stop!”

  His voice is loud, which tells me he’s quickly closing the distance between us. I’m about to sprint away from him, put as much space between us as possible, when I feel a hand tighten around my right bicep and flip me around faster than I can think.

  Dizzy, Micah grips both my biceps to keep me from falling over. I stare him straight in the eyes, pushing all my anger into my glare hoping it’ll get him to let me go. Ryder is standing just outside the hut, watching us intently. Watching me, rather; ready to save me and take me back to the gateway and Geha the minute I even look at him the right way.

  “I’m sorry,” he insists. I wait for his grip to loosen even a little, so I can dash away, but today isn’t my lucky day.

  “Go jump in a boiler,” I spit, rage radiating off my skin. Micah stares at me in utter disbelief.

  “What did you just say to me?” he demands, his grip tightening and shaking me a bit. Now he’s angry, too, but for a completely different reason.

  “You heard me,” I breathe.

  He turns his glare on Ryder, knowing full well who taught me the phrase. Ryder looks away, pretending to not pay attention to Micah or me. He even leans against the doorframe of the hut and kicks the dirt at his feet. Micah growls and turns back to me. Ryder stops kicking up dust and goes back to watching me.

  “Look,” Micah says to me. His tone is calmer, but he is unable to get the anger completely out of his voice yet. His apology is sincere, though. “I’m sorry.”

  “Why should I believe you?” I accuse, my tone already softening. I don’t want to believe him, but it’s difficult to deny the sincerity in his eyes.

  “You know me,” he insists. “I never once lied to you as children.”

  “As you’ve told me, a lot has happened since we were children,” I goad. Part of me is projecting knowing I lied to him about our parents, but I can’t help myself. “Lying could be one of the many bad habits you picked up over the years.”

  “Look into my eyes and tell me that I’m lying.”

  Micah removes his hands from my arms, letting them fall to his sides. A gesture which begs me to listen and says that he’s given up on trying to keep me here. I’m free to run back to Geha if that’s what I want. I can’t, however.

  Although I’ve been looking him in the eyes this entire time, it’s only now that I see the honesty within them. I see his sixteen-year-old-self looking down at me with the love in his gaze I saw every day when we were small. Even more so the day he was taken away – the day he left for his Rite and didn’t return.

  There’s no denying his intentions now. I let go a little of my anger and resentment to listen to him, but it doesn’t take away the heartache thinking he may not have missed me over the years as I did him.

  “Fine,” I concede. “Talk.”

  “Al, I tried to get word to you,” Micah urges.

  He even takes a step toward me to emphasize his desperation to have me believe him. I immediately take a step back. He deflates a little, disappointed I feel the need to keep distance between us, but maintains his urgency to have me understand as he speaks.

  “On more than one occasion I begged and even tried to bribe Loyals to give you a message from me,” Micah insists. “Not one would comply even though I had known every one of them my whole life, and they knew me. They either laughed in my face or hit me to show the other Unfavorable what would happen if they tried what I had.”

  “I am so sorry for the distress I’ve caused you over the years,” he continues. “I’ll let you go back to Geha if that’s what you want, but I hope that you stay a while longer. So that I may spend some of the time with you I’ve missed these last six years and explain what happened and why I’m here in the first place.”

  Tapping my right foot on the dirt, I take my time deciding.

  Give him a chance to explain or not?

  I pout, not sure what to do. On the one hand, he hasn’t shown a whole lot of relief or happiness seeing me here. It’s like I’m just a connection to what he had before. On the other, he’s trying hard to talk to me. Why would he want me to stay if all I meant was a connection to a life he doesn’t seem to want in the first place?

  Whatever his reason, I can’t leave my only brother on a bad note. Who knows if I’ll ever have the time to visit him again once I start my career path in Geha? Decision made, I cease the foot tapping and speak.

  “Okay,” I announce, still pouting. “You have five minutes. Five minutes to explain what happened the day of your Rite. If I haven’t heard anything logically sound by then, I’m going back to Geha for good.”

  Marching past Micah, I stomp back into his hut without another word. He follows me, practically bouncing on his toes. Ryder re-enters last, shutting the door behind him. He retakes his seat on the couch next to me, but closer this time. As if he’s trying to protect me.

  What could he possibly be trying to protect me from?

  Micah goes back to the table, leaning back a little in his chair to keep some distance between us.

  “Well,” he starts. “To put it bluntly, my Rite was rigged.”

  “What?” I ask, wrinkling my nose in confusion. “That’s not possible.”

  “It happened, Al,” he asserts. “I was never told why, but I can guess.”

  “Are you going to tell me, or what?”

  “Calm down,” he teases. A small grin stretches across his lips as if he remembered something funny from years ago. “There’s a whole story with this. It’s a lot more complicated than that.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “Good,” he sighs, gripping his cup a tad too tightly as he recounts his story for me. “I went into my Rite that day with two kids ahead of me and one behind me. When I woke up in the recovery room, there was no one else there. There should have at least been the boy that went in before me, and possibly the girl who went after, but no one was there. It was me alone in the room.”

  “I watched my test tick away on the percentage bar go up anxiously,” he continues. “I was relieved to see I had scored well above average in both Loyalty and Healing – healing just a hair higher. I was so excited. I thought I was going to be a great Healer, like Mom.”

  “Instead of the nurse coming in to let me go home, Loyals came,” Micah depicts, grabbing his half empty cup and swirling the leftovers in circles as he talks. “I had no idea where I was going or what was happening. I wasn’t even sure there was such a thing as Unfavorable until I was brought down here. There were whispers and rumors, but I never paid them any mind. They took me to a room down the hall from the recovery room. There were no windows, no chairs, and no t
able. Just an empty, gray room.”

  “Why would they do something like that?” I query, getting slightly annoyed. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

  “I pissed off the wrong person,” Micah admits, “and it cost me my life in Geha. I wasn’t able to watch you off to your Rite because of it.”

  “Who could you have possibly upset enough to get your Rite rigged?”

  “Skylark Cloudore.”

  “Cloudore?” I ask incredulously, still unsure how all the pieces fit together. “As in the current Arbiter, Cizius Cloudore’s only daughter?”

  “Yes,” Micah nodded, sullenly. He places the cup hard on the table and pours himself some more tea.

  “What did you do to upset her so?”

  “It’s more her father. She and I were happy.”

  “You and her?”

  “Yeah, that’s what I said.”

  “Why didn’t you ever tell me you were interested in anyone?”

  “You were ten-years-old, Al. You wouldn’t have understood.”

  “I suppose. I still thought we shared everything.”

  “We did. Everything besides that.”

  “So, what happened?” I encourage.

  My agitation subsides. I never knew that Micah had any other girls in his life besides Mom and me. It makes me want to know more. Everything he’s saying makes sense. Upsetting the leader of our city would definitely get him kicked out and labeled an Unfavorable. Arbiter Cloudore has the power to do that.

  “Before my Rite, I was trying to court her,” he explains. “I didn’t care that the Mainframe the Developers created would choose a mate for me. I wanted her. She wanted me, too. We loved each other, Al.”

  “I’m so sorry…” I mutter. I’m not sure what else to say, so I wait for him to continue. A moment of silence for his lost childhood passes before he speaks.